017.
the nightmares come crashing down
the essence of the spice of reality
the burn that is inflicted
the ache that is yearning for relief
have all become apparent parts of being
no longer does salt water supply the nuturing it once used to
no longer does spoken words have a meaning
rather its the unspoken thoughts that carry the suffering
lurking amongst my wretched soul
the longer the nightmare seems to play
the more I feel the familiar air of suffocation
and then I realize that this is no dream
the presence of something dark is surrounding me
not letting me free of its bond
anger consumes me as I fight
fight for what I know is a fairy tale come true
the more I fight, the more I struggle, the more I fiend
what is this thing?
what is this deceitfulness?
what is paralyzing my well being?
the constant state of love has hooked me with it’s branches
more like tossed me in its web
the offer that seduced me has now scarred me
and yet I beg for it
asking, pleading for more
why stop what numbs my pain?
is it cause it causes me to react in addict-like ways?
but I need it to go on, to survive
and yet, its being snatched away…
as I shake with withdrawal, I become sober
highly sensitive and vulnerable to my drug
in the dark, I hold out my hand because its there
I can feel its presence radiating with majestic life
and as I reach to touch, it disappears
leaving me in my despair
